Thursday, June 24, 2010

provision

it just doesn't make sense to people
and i KNOW that
and sometimes it's frustrating to attempt to explain to people
even some of my Christian friends who aren't called to the same life of exuberant faith that i have been
(and there is nothing wrong with that--they are called to other things that i'm not)

but money?
i'm not worried about it
which makes NO sense
to anyone who knows my circumstances

God is teaching me that HE and He alone provides my every need
provision
under the best and worst of circumstances

yes, i "lost" my house
but i truly felt that it was a release
a hurtful one at moments
but a release, nonetheless.

i have bills to pay
that i have no earthly idea how they will be paid
but that's just it--earthly ideas don't get me very far
He knows how it will happen

and while sometimes i wonder it people think i'm just sitting around on my butt
waiting
(and in a sense, that's what i'm doing--the waiting part at least
i work my butt off doing all kinds of odd jobs)

*i* know
that every time something is due that is crucial
somehow,
some way
the funds come through

and yeah,
dave ramsey would not be thrilled with my approach
(or maybe he would--
i have a feeling that he understands what it is to live in faith that God will provide)
and it doesn't follow his "program"
which i very much respect
and have many friends who have used it to eliminate debt from their lives

that program
that mindset
is not what i'm called to right now

i don't know why
i don't know for how long
but i know
trusting in Jehovah Jireh--the God who provides
is what i am called to
always
and especially right now

complete and utter faith that HE will work things out?
it's an amazing place to be

i don't know why He chose me to live this way
but i am so, so grateful
because the pure, unadulterated JOY that is a part of this?
is absolutely intoxicating.

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5 comments:

Debbie said...

Lora, that is so wonderful! You are an inspiration to all of us.

Debbie in Nashville said...

Thanks for stopping by. Yes, like Debbie said, you are an inspiration! Good luck and I know things will work out.

Brooke said...

its amazing when we stop trying to be god and just let him do his job.

GraceGetsGreater said...

I think sometimes that God just waits patiently for me to get out of the way so that He can do all of the good stuff that He always intended to.

I admire your faith. You are an amazing woman...and quite the encouragement to me.

And yes...let's walk as soon as we are safely out of triple digit temps!

theUngourmet said...

We are in quite a pickle right now too. Thank you for this post. It helps me to remember that God is truly in control and He cares about our circumstances. :)