emi: the day we said goodbye

it's been nearly two years, but it affected me far beyond what i could have imagined.
and it is the reason my voice went silent for awhile on this blog.
and since she was so much a part of my life, i feel i have to finish her story here.

shortly after moving into our house in march of 2014 we realized that emi was ill.
and after a few trips to the vet the worst was confirmed.
she had cancer.
and if we chose to treat it we *might* get six months to a year more.

we chose to make her as comfortable as possible.
we asked a friend to do a photoshoot with her
we took her on one last trip around nashville to visit the place where i first saw her and the home where we first became a family of three

and we loved on her as much as possible.
and i prayed over her every day, begging that it wouldn't be so.

she found me. she chose me, and she rescued me as much as i rescued her.

and on a sunday morning, more the middle of the night, she slipped away from us.
we both were sleeping in the den with her as we couldn't bear to let her spend her nights alone
and we both petted her and kissed her as she took her last breath assuring her through our sobs that we loved her.

i still visit her little grave in our backyard a couple of times a month. i still find myself saying hello to her when i drive in after work. i still smile when a patch of good sunlight hits "her" spot just right.

and although a little over a year later a kitten came into our lives and our hearts
our emi will always be special

to you, darling girl.

monday's memory: the one with the signing of lots of papers

exactly one month ago
nearly 4 years (3 years and 11 months) after finding out i was losing my home
we signed papers and became homeowners

anthony for the first time
myself given a second chance
the loan is not in my name. we aren't yet done rebuilding my credit from the horrid hit it took way back then. but my name is on the deed

i feel like it's come full circle. that i am being given back in buckets what was taken from me. so grateful that redemption is a part of my journey. so thankful to have a place that's really OURS. and the timing of this and so much more is not escaping me. 

i'll show you photos of the inside once we get unpacked. so in approximately 6 months ;-)

but here we are in front of our adorable house!

and here is anthony giving emi her first tour of our new digs. thankfully, she approves because we aren't leaving here for awhile!

monday's memory: april 366

366 project
my life in pictures, april

monday's memory: the one with february's 366 photos

another month has gone by already -- CRAZY.  here are the photos that (somewhat) tell the story of my february. 

what i'm loving wednesday 12.21

i'm loving the changes on the horizon (and already happening) on the job front for both A and i.  we're both transitioning into new roles and figuring out what it all means...amazing to think that 6 months ago neither of us knew these jobs existed.

i'm loving this amazing lotion i found at whole foods body.  i had this inexplicable rash that started a few days before my wedding and is located around my left collarbone.  after being miserable itchy for a few weeks, i bought this $10 natural lotion and it cleared completely in a week's time.  since then, another patch has materialized, but it's disappearing thanks to the lotion as well.  yay for yummy smelling goodness.

i'm loving random texts from friends, impromptu lunch/dinner/coffee dates, or hikes with cell group girls.  so thankful for the quality people God has surrounded me with!


i'm loving the cuteness i get to enjoy on tuesdays and thursdays.  i often say my two jobs afford me the best of both worlds, and i stand by that.  soon enough, this season will end so i am determined to enjoy it for what it is.  :-)

i'm loving that emi loves this time of year :0).  here she is laying on her favorite (tissue paper) in front of the tree (which she loves to nibble on periodically) while we watched hockey (one of my favorites).

i'm loving that gift shopping is DONE (except for the mailed gifts to family and some friend gifts...but those aren't going to be given ON christmas).

i'm loving that the budget was stuck to, and that we went WAY under for nearly everyone.  Woo-hoo!

i'm loving the prospect of a few days off...and that my husband has one of those days off with me.  suh-weet.

i'm loving that this is our first christmas together...such amazing blessings we've been given, not the least of which happen to be each other :-)

i'm just loving this time of year.  as much as i can't wait for christmas, i'm going to be bummed when this precious season is over.

what i'm loving wednesday (11.30)

i'm loving that emi has similar tastes to mine :-)

(spinach and sour cream dip from trader joe's)

i'm loving this sweet puppy who lived with us for about a week and a half while her family was visiting texas -- she's so much fun!
(emi was not so much loving her though...)

belle :-)

helping us decorate

i'm loving the holiday season, as i do every year.

one of our trees (red and turquoise)

i'm loving the new traditions we're creating while we combine good things from both our families and things we want to do on our own :-)

the wreath on our front door: pine for him, berries for me = perfection

i'm loving the boots i mentioned yesterday

i'm loving my cell group girls...such amazing Godly women...so important in my life

photo by our AMAZING wedding photographer

i'm loving friends i can simultaneously cook and be silly with :-)

i'm loving this, which i'll be explaining a bit more about on a monday soon!

i'm loving going to sporting events with my husband

football (go titans!)

hockey (go PREDS!)

i'm loving that he's my HUSBAND! :-)


i'm loving the sacredness that surrounds this time of year...or at least i'm loving the reminders that all of life is sacred

our advent wreath next to the nativity

what i'm loving wednesday (11.9)

i'm loving that i got to spend the weekend with two sweet boys, 4 and 2

(my standard "respecting privacy" explanation for the backs of heads and through mesh photography)


i'm loving that i'm HOME now


i'm loving that my husband joined us for part of the weekend...and i'm loving that he had the kitchen SPOTLESS when i walked in the house last night for the first time in 4 days.

said husband carrying one child into church while walking next to the oldest. p.r.e.c.i.o.u.s.

i'm loving that our team was the winner for most money raised at the hike for the homeless that i wrote about last week.  i'm SUCH a fan of this organization and i'm grateful that they exist to serve the families who desperately need them.


i'm loving our house, as it comes together slowly but surely.  hopefully i can take you guys on a virtual tour of it soon!


i'm loving "friend dates" that i get to have with my amazing girlfriends!


i'm loving that i have an appointment at the apple store tonight to pick up something else i'll soon be loving!


i'm loving that emi was so happy when i got home last night that she snuggled for a full 5 minutes :-)

it seems like a short list this week, but most assuredly, i'm loving my life and the rich blessings my Papa continues to pour out on us!