...mic check...1...2...

what would i say about the months of silence?
well, nothing. 
what would i tell you about the things i haven't said in those months?
well, plenty

i would say that the payment i get in hugs and smiles and oh yeah illnesses ;-) far outweigh any paycheck i could ever receive

i would say that i never imagined that working in a preschool setting would be so rewarding

i would say that A and i are happier when the house is tidy. i would also say that when one of us is sick, it becomes a lot harder to keep tidy. we definitely work as a team around here, and i adore that

i would say that grown adults who know better can be vindictive and attempt to steal your joy because of their own bitterness all while wearing a sugary smile and proclaiming their love for Jesus
{i could write an entire series on the southern facade that i.desperately.hate. just be real for crying out loud. yanks have that one over southerners hands down}

i would say that only you can let someone steal your joy
{in other words, neener-neener, aforementioned person didn't win ;-) }

i would say that car shopping when you HAVE to car shop isn't as exciting as it seems to be
{moment of silence for lora's amazing passat...it finally died last month. and i have shed more than a couple of tears.}

i would say that fresh flowers in the house brighten my mood immensely. fresh flowers that my husband pick out for me just intensify that!

i would say that i fall more in love with texas each time i visit 
{year 2 for going on a missions trip to a children's home in the hill country. heart partially there}

i would say that getting your garden planted two months {two MONTHS} late just means a longer harvest period
{fingers crossed}

i would say that the God-encounters that you allow yourself to be aware of are more amazing that you could ever come up with by any stretch of your imagination

i would say that i have wanted to come type out long versions of each of these snippets and felt a block of some sort.  so for now they are snippets.  fuller versions on request...or as i have the time to tell them

but really, it doesn't matter what i have to say about the months between january and july.  we did a lot of living during those months.  times spent with great friends, playing board games, crashing on the couch to watch movies, having family over and A *finally* getting his youngest sister and i to watch the LOTR trilogy, taking time for a date night or two, celebrating my birthday and hosting gatherings for each of our best friend's birthdays, A speaking for the first time at our church plant...and there were also tears and hurt, and pain, and stress and confusion and wondering if we had made the right decisions about several things.

and that's life.

the next six months will hold much of the same, and i await it all expectantly.

life without pain means you forget to feel.  because of tears, i feel joy more radically.

i'm not going to make any promises i can't keep. but my desire is to be here, to be real, to live life authentically in this tiny blip in the internet where i get to have my real voice.

so for the good, for the bad, for all the lovely moments in between...here i am.

oh, and if you take the time to be sweet and comment please include what you drive and why you love it. did i mention car shopping is a pain?!


xoxo

thursday's ten or so: the summer bucket list

my friend angie posted on facebook the other day that she had created a summer bucket list. so being the amazing friend that i am, i decided to steal the idea :-)
(it's not REALLY stealing if i give you credit, right angie?!)


so here, in no particular order, are {some of} the things that i'd like to do at least once before summer is over!


go whitewater rafting
take a camping trip (i cannot believe this one is on here...i have NEVER been camping. but anthony loves it so i want to give it a try!)
visit holiday world (most likely with angie!)
see the ocean at least once...hopefully for a long weekend!
host a summer bash at our house just because
do at least one 5k even in the ridiculous tennessee summer heat
jump on a trampoline 
run through a sprinkler
harvest from the garden (hopefully this is ongoing...ha!)
set up the hammock and spend quality time there
hike radnor at least once a month
implement some fun summer pinterest ideas :-)


i'm sure the list will get longer as summer progresses.  but that's a good {fun} start :-)


what do you want to do this summer? anything i should add?

thursday's ten or so: in which i attempt to explain my absence

things i have been up to instead of blogging:

transitions. two jobs ending (one naturally because a child goes to school and another by choice to leave a very unhealthy environment) and two jobs beginning in place of them. the quite lovely thing is that i have been working at minimum 60 hours per week for the last...years? i totaled up the hours that i will be working now and it's almost normal--in the 40-50 hours range. i could cry with joy. for serious.

catching up on dvr'd shows. natasha and i have a weekly date to watch some of them, but the others are watched whenever a chance occurs.

pinning. like crazy!

paying it forward. we had so many people who were generous with time and resources during our wedding prep. i have two girlfriends getting married within a month of each other (last weekend and then in june) so i am trying to make myself as available to them as i can!

coming up with some jewelry design ideas. i would like to open my etsy store again, and am trying to come up with some new and different stuff. on that note, anything you would like to see?

organizing. from the pantry to my iPhoto libraries. i love it. but it is a bit time-consuming since, well, i'm me.  :-)

missing writing/blogging. i think about posts often.  they just never seem to materialize.  hopefully as transition continues to a more livable schedule, that will change. i miss this place!

working in the yard. since i actually enjoy mowing, that comes to me most weeks...plus i have a fledgling garden that i'm trying to protect from the neighborhood bunnies. anthony laughs at me constantly for being in battle with a bunny.  ha!

juicing.  i got a free juicer a few months ago and its definitely been appreciated and used! i'll post some of my favorites here soon.  :-)

hey, it's ok (tuesday) 1.3

hey, it's ok


...to like quiet toys much more than loud ones
...to be very excited about the new plush throw you are ordering for your living room tonight
...to be happy to go grocery shopping (probably has to do with the healthy fresh and good tasting ingredients i am buying lately. or maybe whole foods pumps happy essential oils into their hvac...either way...)
...to sometimes be tired of dealing with poop from small creatures
...to be reminded by that statement that the litter box needs attention. sigh.
...to be ready to plant seeds and grow herbs and veggies, not to sit through months of cold and yuck.
...to have had great memories of 2011, and to look forward to more goodness in 2012
...to still have your Christmas decorations up.  it's still Christmas until january 6, after all :D
(but no guarantee that we'll take them down that day...)


visit amber to join up with your own list!

what i'm loving wednesday (6.15.11)

click the pic to go to the host site!

i'm loving this new job, with children who are precious, precocious and who continually keep me on my toes.

i'm loving times spent with this wonderful guy

i'm loving spiritual community and family.  my cell group girls, pastors, and the amazing people God has surrounded me with!

i'm loving odwalla protein drinks.  nom, nom.

i'm loving the slightly cooler temperatures and rainfall this week.  i love the heat, but this is a nice little break. (and by 'break' i mean in the low 90s...)

i'm loving getting back into jewelry making lately! planning to devote some serious time to it in the next month or so :-)

i'm loving my sunroof and hammock! both allow me access to the outdoors...

i'm loving that my garden is growing, slowly but surely! (this picture is from about a week ago, and that itty bitty tomato is nearly twice as big now!)

what i'm loving wednesday .3

necan you believe i wrote the majority of this post last night?  and 8:40 pm on wednesday it's finally almost ready to publish.  sigh.  that's how this day has gone people :)  can you tell i need to focus on the good stuff?

i'm loving the way anthony gets so cutely intense while playing a game like angry birds

i'm loving monday nights at emanate

i'm loving strawberry milkshake flavored pop-tarts.  i'm not even kidding.

i'm loving this sweet snuggly (under protest) kitty

i'm loving that it's finally time for planting!  i got my herbs in their planters on saturday (and currently am playing the game of hide and seek with them and the storms!) and as soon as we get a nice dry day i'll be planting tomatoes, cucumbers and squash!

i'm loving the commercial with the man and beaver.  haven't seen it?  ok...here ya go


i'm loving how crazy and fun God is :-)  i'm currently sitting at the 2nd of at least 3 unplanned babysitting jobs for the week.  it's goooood people, it's good.

Thursday's Ten: thanksgiving '10

(you should all participate in this one. just sayin')

today i am thankful

- for the table we will gather at with anthony's family.  for them, their hospitality, and their immediate acceptance of me.  and that they asked me to bring something that's traditional in MY family today so i'm bringing green bean casserole and pumpkin pie.  and so incredibly grateful i didn't get a preparatory letter like this one with instructions. (read it.  you'll laugh)

- for the man i love and our time together so far...and for SO.MUCH to look forward to.  for future plans that excite me, for knowing that he loves God more than he loves me...so the balance is alllll gooooood.  and that he's a dork, just like me.

- for emi, who scrunches her face up into "her" chair, who sits on the piano bench more often than i do, who jumps up on the bed to be loved on as soon as i walk in the door, who runs to greet me when i arrive, who sometimes just runs around the house like a crazed animal, who is stingy (but rewarding) with her purrs, who loves to chase a laser light, and who most nights will cuddle with me at bedtime just for a little while.

- for life in the garden, in the herb planters.  and that i've managed to keep a cilantro plant alive for a whole month now.

-  for the fact that i just drove to anthony's apartment with my sunroof open.  on thanksgiving day, people.  it's in the 70s today :D

(and yes, it'll be cold tomorrow.  but i can be thankful for warm weather on thanksgiving!)

- for friends who get me.  and for those who don't, but accept that i'm a little crazy ;-)

- for the spiritual communities that have shaped my faith.  this journey has been a wild ride, for SURE  but i've told many people to buckle up and raise their hands because it's the ultimate thrill ride!

- for the privilege of being called to live this way.  so completely dependent on God for provision and strength that i pretty much live just like this quote:

"But God doesn't call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through"

(Francis Chan)

- for my wii, dvr, laptop and iphone that serve as distractions when i need them, entertainment when i'm lacking, exercise when it's hot/cold/rainy, and connections with those i love. yes, all of them have their downsides, but using them for their intended purpose has been a blessing

- for so many countless things in addition: my dog magnet that has dogs of all shapes, sizes and breeds flocking to me and giving me affection.  for starbucks and my ridiculous collection of travel mugs.  for road trips with friends.  for snuggles on the couch.  for naps.  for worship.  for babies and the privilege of watching them grow.  for the families who have supported me and entrusted me with their most valuable possessions -- their children.  for learning about and beginning to operate more fully in my giftings.  for laughter.  for family.  for so.much.more.

and of course...for all of you.  who come here and read what i have to say, who humble me with the way you respond, who encourage me with your friendship.  i started blogging just for me, and i'm ever surprised and blessed that you hang out with me here in this small corner of the internet. so thankful that our lives (and blogs) have crossed paths.  :)

things that made me smile today

(erm...yesterday? and early today?)

the drive to work--gorgeous country roads (and only 15 minutes away from my house...perfect)

upon arrival to work, hearing P yell "hi! hi! hi!" before i could even see him

(he's SO precious!)

my voice student's smile when i told her the song she's been working on is nearly performance ready

babysitting tonight for children i go to church with but don't see on a truly regular basis...and hearing the oldest (a 4 year old little girl) say "i love you miss lora" out of the blue.

modern family reruns after the kids went to bed

extra money for next week's excursion because i took this job tonight.

emi being happy to see me when i finally got home

the tomato plants i planted yesterday still standing :) -- in fact, perked up quite a bit because of the slight shower they got this evening.

so even though i left my house at 7:45 am, and i just walked in the door at 12:26 am the following day ...

i'm blessed

i truly enjoyed all 3 of my jobs today

and even though i'm wiped out

i'd do it again

(not just to earn the money)...but because right now? i get to LOVE my job.

yeah, i'm not rolling in money

i still wonder about what's in my financial future

but i love what i do

and right now

in this moment

that's where i'm supposed to be.

Thursday's Ten: Warmer Weather Edition

it's finally getting to be the time of year that makes living in middle tennessee completely worth it.

warm

not yet too humid

(although give it a couple of weeks)

and not over 100 degrees just yet

perfection

well, without a beach

THAT would be perfection

:)

here's my list of ten things i love to do around town when it starts warming up :)

1. go for a hike or a walk. besides the greenway, radnor lake is a favorite place. and amazingly enough i have just moved within a few moments of the trails there!

2. visit the zoo. anthony and i joined last year and i'm totally renewing my membership. with my new nanny gig(s) (more about that later...) and friends who love animals as much as we do it's pretty much a necessity. plus the reciprocal membership with zoos around the country is fantastic!

3. lay out. i know, i know, sun damage...skin cancer...but i CRAVE the sun. i'm never out THAT long...

4. eat. which kind of doesn't seem to fit with the above, but shall i explain? fresh fruits and veggies straight from the garden, avocados sliced up on a sandwich, organic stuff--just anything! i feel like eating so healthily during these summer months--which is probably why i don't have a problem with the diet and exercise routine!

5. garden. i'm excited because this year i'll be planting tomatoes in the ground, plus reviving my herb garden in containers!

6. head to the park--grown-up park with friends, playground park with kids. they're all fun, and everyone feels like a kid when we just play!

7. read. on a rainy or cloudy day, curling up in a chair. when it's nice outside, taking a book and a blanket to the yard and just hanging out with the characters for awhile.

8. take a nap. there's something about coming home on a sunday afternoon...opening the curtains...putting a comfy robe or pj set on...and laying down in the sunlight. it's my inner cat, i suppose--emi and i usually jostle for the most sunny area to sleep in!

9. have a popsicle. those fla-vor-ice pops from when you were a kid? yeah, i totally keep a box on hand at all times. pure sugar...pure fun

10. get a pedicure. ok, so this one is a self-done pedi lately...just can't justify the expense for myself at the moment! but there's something about walking around in flip-flops with pretty feet that makes life a little sunnier :)

what about you? as it warms up, what do you like to do?

Bad Haiku Friday

Going to a maze!
(made of corn). Nope, not kidding
It's a cornfield maze.

I wish I were kidding.
But that's what we're doing tomorrow.

The kids love it.

When I was their age I could have done it for free right next to my house!

Don't believe me? Here's the website: http://www.rippavilla.org/cornmaze.asp

A few highlights from their website--with original bolding and punctuation intact:


The maze will not be haunted at any time.
(can they guarantee that? Do they have an agreement with the ghosties?)
NO SMOKING!!! CORN IS FLAMMABLE!!
(you don't say!)
Do not pick, pull, throw or damage the corn. You may eat the corn for survival purposes only !!
(this, to our middle schoolers, means that they haven't seen chocolate in 10 minutes. expect a few less ears of corn when we leave)
If you have small children, are pregnant, claustrophobic, have a medical condition, or get easily frustrated we advise against entering the maze.
(If you have lack of common sense, we advise obtaining some)
Out of common courtesy, please refrain from using cell phones in the maze, unless absolutely necessary.
(what is this? a movie?! I think 100 middle schoolers and not enough adults constitutes "absolutely necessary", thankyouverymuch)

I love the teenagers...
I love the teenagers...
I love the teenagers...
I LOVE THE TEENAGERS!
(this should be proof)

:0)

In My Garden

In my garden
I pretend to grow things that last for exactly as long as I nourish them

In my garden
thai basil is flourishing
the italian basil, oregano, thyme, rosemary, dill, and catnip need a bit more convincing
not to mention the lavender and cilantro I'm attempting to grow in pots indoors

In my garden
Emi is more than willing to eat the grass that sprouts up easier than anything else

In my garden
the tomatoes are making me happy
A rose has miraculously survived the past 5 years of my ineptness
A few annual flowers are thriving

In my garden
the moonflowers are poised to bud

In my garden
I can pretend to have a green thumb
I can sit in the evening hours with my laptop and a cup of tea
I can watch the rain

I'm a fan.

What's in your garden this year?

Thursday's Ten

Ten Simple Things I'm Loving...

1. good drinks on a patio






















2. girlfriends and sun

















3. Kissing






















4. sleeping kitties

















5. Blooms






















6. Trips to the zoo with my beau

















7. Working from home






















8. tomatoes in my garden

















9. Roses (also in my garden)

















10. Seeing views like this (I passed the airport last night and noticed the sunset skyline...how cool is that?!)