hey, it's ok (tuesday) 12.27

hey, it's ok


...to get choked up while watching ellen.  or the soldier appreciation episode of rachael ray.
...to see someone giving design/creative ideas on a talk show and thinK "she totally got that off pinterest"
...to toooootally have baby fever after cuddling our friends 11 week old for an evening
...to have paused everything to watch drew brees break the record last night, and to be genuinely happy for him.
...to talk about football (or hockey) in everyday conversation ;-) and your blog
...to have LOVED your Christmas celebrations, been totally overwhelmed by all the generosity given to you, and to just feel completely blessed by the whole season
...to be glad for a quiet day after Christmas to unwind a bit from ALL that family time, as good as it was
...to have been really spoiled over the long weekend by going to bed (too) late and still getting a solid 7-8 hours of sleep
...to still not understand why people want sweet stuff on their meat.  pass the spice and savory; keep your apples away from my roast


visit amber's blog and link up with your own list of what's ok in your world!

hey, it's ok tuesday

one of my favorite bloggers, amber, has been doing this for awhile and today i'm joining her!

hey, it's ok

... to still type in www.cingular.com when going to pay your at&t bill, simply because you liked cingular better

(and it still works, so other people must think it's ok too)

... to sleep in on tuesday because you were up for 20 hours on monday

(that's more than ok.  that's *necessary*!)

... to cry on a fairly regular basis while watching ellen

... to be focused on getting your living area clutter free for the sole reason that you want to put a Christmas tree up stat

(and by "stat" i mean the day after thanksgiving, of course)

... to pretty much subsist on a diet of soups and other hot foods for the next 3 months

... to absolutely HATE the fall back time change.  

(seriously, these are the saddest months of my life. getting dark between 4 and 5 is just NOT ok)

... to literally roll out of bed and go to work in yoga pants and a tank top/sweatshirt most days, especially if you change into "real" clothing and put on makeup before you actually see anyone except the 15 month old and his parents -- who are good friends of yours anyway.  

(are you telling me you'd do anything different if you had to be at work at 6 am?!)

... to really, really, really miss having a bathtub instead of just a shower stall.  and to really, really, be considering posting a facebook status about trading an hour of free babysitting for an hour of tub time.

... to have loved the oprah show (which you never watch) with the sound of music cast reunion SO much that you're trying to figure out how to get a dvd copy of it since you watched it on someone else's tivo

Thursday's Ten: Things I'm Discovering Through...

I know we're not all in the same situations right now, so adapt this to what you're doing right now
(things i'm discovering through pregnancy, mommyhood, running, new job, whatever)



mine?

Ten Things I'm Discovering Through Moving
(some of which i already knew but have been reminded of)

1. I'm a horrid packrat.
2. No one needs this many buttons, safety pins, or receipts.
3. Help is golden.
4. I don't care nearly as much about being organized when I have a deadline to meet. Throw it in a box and sort it out later!
5. Dishwashers breaking when one needs to wash a load and a half of dishes sucks. However, if you no longer OWN said dishwasher...oh well! :)
6. Breaks are golden too.
7. No matter how prepared I am, or how much time I have to move, I am STILL in panic mode at the end. This move I wasn't prepared at ALL (literally found out 10 days before the moveout day that I had to be out that day) and I'm not nearly as stressed. Why? Because I'm prioritizing. Those things that are precious and valuable to me are already packed or earmarked to be with me. Those things that aren't I couldn't care less about. Dump and Nashville Rescue Mission--both will be bursting at the seams with my donations on Friday!
(I guarantee you I won't be such a packrat in the future. Sentimental? Yes. But for scrapbooking and stuff. Not for stupid things that don't matter.)
8. Ellen playing on the DVR while I'm packing in the living room = priceless.
9. There isn't enough caffeine in the house.
10. I'm going to be a much better person for this move. :0)

A look back:

*for those of you wondering, the back is still out. The sinuses seem to be somewhat fading, but I've definitely made the back worse after there had been a significant improvement over the last couple of days. I think I've taken about 10 steps backwards, and just hope that future progress is positive!*

Ellen quote that sums me up right now:

"This morning I hopped right out of bed...and by hopped I mean it took 30 minutes, 6 Advil, a pulley system and a handful of sedatives to get me out of bed in a seated position. And I know that you're probably thinking 'Ellen, you shouldn't have to be taking Advil and sedatives together', but the Advil was for me and the sedatives were for Portia; the screaming is killing her...she's tired of hearing me scream."

Sad...but true. Substitute "Lora" for Ellen and "Anthony" for Portia, and you have the partial scenario of me trying to get up off the floor tonight. It was NOT pretty.

anyway, on to the real blogging!

It's been quite a year! Here's a brief look back...

January: New Year's at Anthony's parents house; began "driving Miss Nancy"; Inauguration of President Obama
February: good friend from college visited; sweet Valentine's day; last praise team retreat ever with Randy (although we had no idea)
March: one of my best friends from high school visited this month; 28th birthday
April: Dave Matthews Band concert...uh...I'm sure there were other fun things too. We did join the zoo this month...and I did have one CRAZY day!
May: Anthony and I traveled together for the first time--to see his aunt in Atlanta; started doing some consulting work
June: 10 year high school reunion and reconnection with Dotty; good friend Laura had her baby Israel (and began the many births of summer '09)
July: Camp with youth group + Anthony's family vacation = over 2 weeks apart! Ugh.
August: Laura and sweet baby Izzy spent a few days at my house; went to Texas to a friend's wedding with Anthony and our friend Ben; celebrated a year of dating the most wonderful man :); began working at Catholic Charities temporarily; found out that Randy and LaJuana were moving
September: visited the Jack Daniels distillery; found out about Sam's cancer
October: 2nd annual ghost tour; finally cut my hair to donate (after over a year of growth); went to my very first NFL football game (between my two favorite teams no less!)
November: Thanksgiving with Anthony's family
December: Christmas with Anthony's family; 2 trips to Indiana (one for the Colts game, one for Christmas); got to sing in a friend's Christmas show downtown; also sold jewelry offline for the first time!

I'm Just Me

I've had at least 4 people in the last week come up to me at church or send me a message saying "I stumbled onto your blog the other day"

It's a bit disconcerting.

After all, when I'm semi-anonymous it's "safe" to write all of this stuff. And yes, my boyfriend reads this blog (hi honey!) and a handful of friends do as well, but it still seemed "safe".

And then tonight I was singing on the worship team at church, filling in for my very preggo friend Jes who just wasn't up to the task (understandably--she IS nearly ready to deliver!). And Randy, our worship minister, introduced a song that he recently wrote. It's all about dropping the facade, being authentic, and letting even the ugly parts show.

And I realized that's what I do on this blog. I'm "inside out", as the song says, and I'm just me...and that's ok.

So here I am...

a girl who was once afraid--terrified--to love
a woman that disagrees fundamentally with her current church's position on "women in the church"
one who often lets a curse word slip (sometimes even here in written form!)
who has taken a quote from her favorite Ellen/Gladys conversation to heart: "I love Jesus, but I drink a little"
who is broken and blessed, all at the same time
who, as much as she has fought against it and tried to take it back, has left a little piece of herself in a small, southern Indiana farmtown
who is madly in love with Jesus
who likes to write about her thoughts, both frivilous and semi-deep
who would love to lose the 20 or so pounds that crept on when her former ED self began to actually enjoy food
and who has determined
that this blog
will be 100%
authentically
totally
REAL

That's what you've got. And everyday I'm humbled and amazed that several of you seem to enjoy reading what I have to say. What began as a creative outlet has led me to so many friendships and opened my eyes to new worlds.

I'm grateful.

And this girl? Isn't going anywhere. So no matter if I've known you since middle school (hi Angie!), am dating you, go to church with you, have met you through an online voice somewhere, or any of the categories in between...I'm glad you're here to share this part of my journey with me. It's a bumpy road, this Life, but I'm blessed beyond measure to have people like you in my path.

Recipe of the Week +

If this blog is scattered, I apologize. I'm currently watching Ellen. And Lady Gaga is on. In some sort of spacesuit attire, standing on the piano bench in stilettos and leaned over to actually PLAY the piano. Oddest thing I have ever seen. If you don't believe me, just go here and you can see it for yourself. We-ird! So I'm distracted, just a bit!

Luckily I don't have to be in too sound of a mindframe to simply post a recipe...so here you go.

I took a Rachael Ray recipe and made it even easier--woo-hoo! I made these for a Girl's Night I had at my house a couple of weeks ago, and then again for Anthony and I the other night for dinner (coupled with almond tossed green beans and a small tomato salad for me). It went over well for both crowds, so I'm definitely adding it to the rotation!

Ranch Stuffed Potato Skins

4 Idaho potatoes
Extra virgin olive oil for drizzling
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 cup milk
1 packet dry ranch dressing mix (I use Hidden Valley Ranch)
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

Pre-heat the oven to 425ºF.

Scrub the potatoes of any excess dirt and prick them each several times with a fork. Place them on a baking sheet, drizzle them with olive oil and season with salt and freshly ground black pepper, tossing lightly to coat. Bake the potatoes in the oven until tender, about 45-60 minutes, depending on the size of the potatoes. Remove the baked potatoes from the oven and let cool enough to handle.

While the potatoes are cooling, combine the milk and ranch dressing mix. Season the ranch mixture with salt and freshly ground black pepper and reserve in the refrigerator until the potatoes are ready.

Once the potatoes are cool, cut them in half lengthwise and scoop the insides out into a mixing bowl, leaving a thin layer of flesh still intact on each half. Be sure not to pierce the skin of the potato while doing so.

Add the ranch to the potato and mash lightly to mix everything together. Season with salt and freshly ground black pepper and scoop the filling back into the hollowed out potato shells, dividing it evenly between all eight potato halves.

Place the potato skins back onto a baking sheet and sprinkle the cheese over each of them. Place them back into the oven to melt the cheese, 1-2 minutes.

Bonus: the cardinal couple who was yelling at Emi this afternoon when she ventured onto the back patio. I'm guessing that I will see baby cardinals soon...

Thursday's Ten

Today's Ten: Ten Things I'll Do Now That Most of my TV Shows are Over

1. Transform my patio garden into a meditation space as well as functional garden. I want to start doing yoga on the patio as often as possible. I need to find the perfect water source--I've been looking for over a year, so hopefully I'll find the perfect fountain...or whatever.

2. Clean more often ;-)

3. Pull stuff out for a yard sale--hopefully the end of June.

4. Continue making my home and environment more "green".

5. Organize ALL the closets in the house. That should take awhile.

6. Cook more often, and entertain.

7. Get my scrapbooking caught up.

8. Make some more jewelry--I've been slacking in that department lately.

9. Get caught up on correspondence.

10. Watch more Rachael Ray and Ellen :0)