Saturday's Song (or Sunday's)

I first heard this song on a commercial for...something. When I looked up the lyrics I realized how incredibly descriptive of life it really is. Life is a maze; love is a riddle. Yeah. Kind of! :0)

Lenka: The Show

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go
I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

Slow it down
Make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
'Cause it's too much
Yeah, it's a lot
To be something I'm not

I'm a fool
Out of love
'Cause I just can't get enough

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

The sun is hot
In the sky
Just like a giant spotlight
The people follow the sign
And synchronize in time
It's a joke
Nobody knows
They've got a ticket to that show
Yeah

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

Just enjoy the show

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

Thursday's Ten (on Friday)

10 Ghosts Who Live in Nashville...according to the Nashville Ghost Tours

Ok, so we went on the coolest Ghost Tour last night. We're planning to do Franklin in the next couple of weeks...but for now, here's Nashville's most famous ones...with a few pics sprinkled in.




1. Hermitage Hotel - baby in room 910 (which no longer exists, it's now in the $3000/night Presidential Suite). People often call the front desk complaining about the continual crying of a baby from a room close to them.


2. Hermitage Hotel - Lady in White (woman murdered by her husband around 1911)

3. Hermitage Hotel - Southern Belle (woman who by her period clothing apparently resided in a house that existed before the Hermitage. Because of a little skirmish we like to call the Civil War, they have no records of who she could be, but she's appeared in a few photographs and has been seen mostly on the bottom 2 floors of the hotel)

our guide Darcy and the Orb that follows her around the Capitol...

4. Capitol - William Stillwell, the original architect of the Capitol, and Samuel Morgan, the overseer of the project. They couldn't STAND each other, and both are buried in the building itself. The Capitol is where rookie cops are stationed. There are several police reports of hearing arguing coming from inside the building, only to discover that no one is there and there is no evidence of a breakin. Most people agree that Stillwell and Morgan are still arguing, much as they did when they were alive. There are also police reports documenting officers being locked into/out of a room by an unseen force and having to call for backup.

5. Capitol - James K Polk is the only President who is buried on the grounds, along with his wife Sarah. People report seeing orbs dancing around the tomb quite often. Our tour guide called it an orbgy. Haha. We didn't see any, or maybe just one, but it was fun to look for them.

another orb maybe?

6. St Mary's of the Seven Sorrows - the ghosts in the bell tower ring the bells at odd times. There's never any explanation for this, as the bells are no longer actually used...it's an electronic system that rings on the hour.

7. St Mary's of the Seven Sorrows - Bishop Richard Pius Miles. Several visitors and parishoners--and even priests--of St Mary's reported seeing an elderly gentleman, dressed in black and walking with a cane walking around the church. These reports went on for several years until a renovation of the church in 1969. During construction a tomb was found. In the outer coffin was a plaque that read Bishop Pius Miles, first Bishop of the Diocese of Nashville, died 1860. The ones who discovered the plaque assumed that during the Civil War, when the church served as one of several hospitals, the plaque was removed for fear of grave desecration. Over time people forgot the tomb existed. The inner coffin discovery was more surprising, however. Although it had been over 100 years since the Bishop's death, his body was perfectly preserved. This is one of the criteria for sainthood in the Catholic Church, so it is possible that he will at some point in the future become a saint. The more interesting point though is that he exactly matched the description of the man who had so often been spotted. After his re-interrment in the meditation room of the church he has never been spotted again. Guess he just needed to be noticed :0)




8. Ryman Auditorium - Hank Williams Sr. He often plays with the lights or sings after hours on the stage. Whispering Bill Anderson also reported that he felt Hank's spirit after playing one of his tunes during sound check--and everything around him lost power. He believed that Hank was putting his seal of approval on his career.

9. Ryman Auditorium - Captain Ryman himself. He's been known to heckle performances that he doesn't approve of. He originally built the Ryman as a house of worship, and when Carmen came to the Ryman several years after his death he heckled from the audience during each show. Since then he's made his disapproval known if a show comes in that he doesn't like.

10. Ryman Auditorium - the Man in Gray...believed to be perhaps a Confederate Soldier...is often seen in the balcony, but only during sound checks and rehearsals as well as other times the balcony is unoccupied.

A Little Calamity...

"If you've got one drink and one friend and 45 minutes. Slow rides make for boring stories. A little calamity...now that's worth talking about"(Grey's Anatomy)

I got my Grey's fix tonight and watched last night's episode. It ended with that quote, and I immediately grabbed a pen to write it down. Well, ok. I actually paused the tv, opened my facebook quote edit page, AND googled the quote. But you get the idea.

At any rate, those words resonated with me. I think it's safe to say that I've not had a slow ride lately, and that there's been some calamity involved. Now...whether it's worth talking about or not, I guess you all will decide.

Most of you probably know or have heard that I lost my job 2 months ago. I have no idea why--honestly. I was given a total BS reason, and I've been searching for a new career ever since. I miss C a lot, although not nearly as much as I first feared.

What HAS happened positively over the last 2 months? Well, I've learned a lot about me. In the interest of getting to bed at a semi-decent hour I'm just going to make a short list.

1. I obtained a lot of my self-worth from what I did for work.
I actually started realizing this early on when I started nannying--because I always had to qualify when people asked me about my job. I never thought it sounded 'good enough' to just reply with nanny. I always made it clear that I had taught for 5 years, etc.
So when I LOST the nanny gig...my self-confidence scraped the bottom.

2. Sometimes it's ok to ask for help. And it's ok to accept help even when you haven't asked for it.
I've had to really humble myself--with borrowing money from my parents, with talking to lenders about why they aren't being paid, with accepting a scholarship to go on women's retreat this year.
A wise friend told me today: "Sometimes it's better to receive. To let someone else have the gift and blessing of helping you"
I've always loved to help others. It's been a very hard thing for me to accept help. That's pride, pure and simple, and I'm (somewhat) happy to report that it's fading. Quickly.

3. I do have the capacity to face crisis with dignity.
Several friends have told me how much they admire the way I've "handled" this. Well, it's not all me. That's for sure. I have a fantastic support system, and I'm learning to trust God like I never have before.

4. There is joy in the midst of sorrow.
My relationship with A began right as all of this was transpiring. And it's been an amazing blessing to have such a wonderful man in my life. He reminds me constantly that he thinks I'm beautiful, that he appreciates the passion I have for life, and we have SUCH wonderful honesty and communication.
This is not the only joyful surprise that God had for me in all of this, but it is one I am reminded of daily.

5. There is opportunity to help those in need even when I feel I don't have the resources.
I've discovered this in a few ways--friends who have needed rides because they locked their keys in the trunk of the car...a neighbor and friend whose brother was dying who needed errands run and her dog kept while family poured in for the funeral...another who needed to crash on the couch for a night or two to get better sleep than she was getting in the stressful home environment she found herself in.
I don't have to have a lot of money in the bank or a whole lot of resources to do these things. I just have to listen to what those I love need. I think after this whole experience I'll find myself a more empathetic and caring person.

So, where do I go from here? Hell if I know. But what I DO know is that I have a future. I have a hope, and I trust in the Father who knows what lies ahead.

Blog from the Backyard

This is an excerpt from a journal entry I wrote after swing dancing this weekend. Enjoy :0)

In the corner near us and the band was a beautiful young girl, her flowing brown hair pulled back into a ponytail. Her partner was a tall and dashing man with thick wavy hair. They were so obviously in love--they never once seemed to notice the swirling dancers around them or the fact that I can't stop watching them. I took note of their simple matching rings. I envied them--their obvious deep love, their lives just beginning...and then I blinked. Sunddenly I saw his snow white hair, her gently wrinkled face. Instead of living on the brink of a life together they are closer to the end of their time. I can imagine that the days they have lived have brought many sorrows as well as joys, pain as well as promise. Yet, they are so full of love and hope that I simply cannot take my eyes away.

She smiles coyly as he spins her out and back, and they sway together in the way that only those that truly know their partners can, looking deeply into each other's eyes. This is their story, their beautiful legacy, and I find myself wanting to continue it.

I'll probably never know their names. But I hope one day, when I have hair streaked with gray and I am nearing the end of my journey, that someone will see me dancing with my soulmate and be as inspired by our story as I have been tonight.

This Week's Ten

Not even close to Thursday this time:

10 Ways You Know You're In a Play

1. You work on your choreography in the aisle at the grocery store
2. People tell you that you are more energetic that normal...this comes from constantly being "on" during rehearsals and staging...and leaks into everyday life
3. You're constantly wondering why you can't feel the spotlight on your face
4. Radio stations do not have the appeal they normally do, as you're constantly singing the tunes from the show
5. The two year old you nanny for knows all the steps to "7 Daughters of Jethro" and helps you out when you forget them.
6. If you're home for more than 8 hours at a time (including sleep time!) you wonder what's wrong
7. You can't have a conversation without mentioning something funny that happened in rehearsal the other night
8. You lay awake at night pondering your stage makeup application.
9. You've said "I can't. I have rehearsal" so many times in the last couple of months that you've lost count.
10. You're happy to have your life back after the closing night...but so very sad that it's over.

Recipe of the Week: Healthy Chicken Tenders

as usual, I adapted a recipe. So I'm typing the original in black and putting my additions in red :0)

Healthy Chicken Fingers

1 1/2 tbsp flour
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp salt
cayenne pepper
crushed red pepper
black pepper

16 trimmed chicken tenderloins (obviously I don't cook 16 for just me--it's an easy recipe to halve/quarter)

olive oil spray
2 tbsp light butter (I don't usually add this particular ingrediant)
1 1/2 tbsp hot sauce(ok, for this I used Louisiana wing sauce and about 4-5 tbsp of it instead of the butter. I also splashed some tabasco in there. But I like it spicy)

combine dry ingrediants in shallow dish and dredge chicken spray a frying pan with olive oil spray and cook chicken. Add hot sauce and butter until chicken is well-coated. Serve with celery sticks and homemade low-fat ranch dressing (made with hidden valley ranch mix, low-fat mayo, and skim milk).

:0)

Recipe of the Week: Fettucine Alfredo

You've gotta love the technology age. I'm in the middle of Kroger tonight and I realize that I already ate the leftovers that were on my meal plan for tonight...oops. So I decide that I have a craving for fettucine alfredo and realizing that I could spend $4 on bottled alfredo sauce or $6 on the ingredients for the real deal (and make several batches from it!) I took out my cell phone and googled a recipe for alfredo sauce. The following recipe is a mixture of what I found on allrecipes.com and what I added.

Alfredo Sauce

1/4 cup butter
1 cup heavy cream
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 1/2 cups freshly grated Parmesan cheese (YES I hand-grated a wedge and it was *fabulous*)
1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley
1 tbsp crushed red pepper
5 slices sun-dried tomatoes, chopped
black pepper to taste

Melt butter in saucepan, add cream. Simmer for 5 minutes. Add cheese and garlic, whisk until smooth and well-blended. Add parsley, red pepper, tomatoes and black pepper.

I also broiled 2 chicken tenderloins which I chopped and added to the sauce. Served over fettucine noodles and YUM.

:0)

Saturday's Song

Today's song:

New Soul, Yael Naim

I love the catchy melody of this song. I first heard it on a commercial for something...I have no idea what it was for now. The product was forgettable, but the song was not :0)

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)

See I'm a young soul in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake
But why all this hate? try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make
La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)

This is a happy end
Cause you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong

This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take you far away

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

New soul... (la, la, la, la,...)
In this very strange world...
Every possible mistake
Possible mistake
Every possible mistake
Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...

Thursday's Ten (on Friday)

I was gone ALL DAY yesterday, so this one's a little late :0)

Ten Things You Should Definitely Do if You're going to KY Kingdom

10. Ride on the van with adults instead of the bus with the kids. Ahhh.

9. If you're like me, under NO circumstances should you wear sunscreen because it will interfere with your tanning plans. If you're like the rest of the population, put on sunscreen and reapply. I embrace sunburns; most people do not.

8. Wear a swimsuit under your clothing. The waterpark is definitely worth it.

7. Himalaya. I love this ride :0)

6. Breakdance. I really didn't want to do this one because I was afraid that the spinning would make me sick, but it was definitely fun.

5. Blizzard River. Warning--it's REALLY cold, but it's a nice little rafting experience. Nothing as fun as actually whitewater rafting, but still nice.

4. The Tornado. It's basically the most fabulous water slide ever

3. The Deluge Water-Coaster. Very cool--and wet!

2. Thunder Run--a very fun wooden roller coaster. My favorite.

1. Drive a little further north and go to Holiday World instead